Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Acqua

*splish* *splash*

- ... so at the end, the doctor told me I had to work out. He gave me several options and I chose water sports; you know, swimming, aqua-aerobics, diving ...

- You never liked swimming or anything like that before, why did you select them?

- Well, I am now old and incontinent...

- ...Little bugger!!!
*splish* *splash*

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Grrrrrrrrrrr!

Update: some other technical/gruff ladettes.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

The week of the freak-animals


giant squids


three-heads toad


26 toes cat


and some violent monkeys

They all give me the creeps. I want one of those.

Chulo

Miorgasmeyo


Orasmeyensennn aquí y aquí.

I love boys pants

Lástima que no había en colores seductores.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Is safer when they are behind a screen (a reason to watch Bollywood)

Look at them! Cool!

Let's go nearer!

:'( I wanna go!

Dialogue F

She: So? What's the problem?

Her friend: He ignores me every time there is footy on TV...

She: I had the same problem with my boyfriend. It stopped annoying me after I slept with his best mate. And his dad.

Dialogue B

He: Do you think I am an idiot for falling in love with an English girl?

His friend : Why?

He: You know what they say; they are all sluts, they often cheat and fuck around and so and so.

His friend: Well, she fell for you, an Italian man. I guess that makes you even.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Fascinating!

Stephane: P. S. R. Parallel Synchronized Randomness. An interesting brain rarity and our subject for today. Two people walk in opposite directions at the same time and then they make the same decision at the same time. Then they correct it, and then they correct it, and then they correct it, and then they correct it, and then they correct it. Basically, in a mathematical world these two little guys will stay looped for the end of time. The brain is the most complex thing in the universe and it's right behind the nose.
[plays drums]
Stephane: Fascinating!

Nunca de los nuncas

Pensé que una rola de Arctic Monkeys pudiera sonar chingón en salsa. Bájenla justo aquí. También en esa compilación está una de Coldplay, que a diferencia del grupito ése, no está nada pinche.

Setso en el otso en etseso



Otro más tierno: El Delfín

Ahhhh

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Revenge of the Sheep



Blame Peter Jackson for blowing up one of them, they went balistic afterwards.

Esos chinos no se andan por las ramas

De seguro al pobre -cuasi- muerto se le ocurrió meterse con algún miembro de la jerarquía política que movió sus influencias al verse estafado. Igual y en Mexicalpán de las Tinajas también lo mandaban a matar (nomás que por andar cultivando uña de gato, sacando agua de Tlacote, fabricando similares de Fataché o Secretagogue o alguna mamada así) con la diferencia de que el trámite sería menos engorroso ya que ni juicio se necesitaría.

Neta que se ganan que les vean la cara quienes creen en que el té de bilis de renacuajo les va a dar la potencia sexual de un jumento.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Happy Valentine's Day!


This year, why don’t you give your valentine an enema?
Because nothing says I love you better than a hose in your backside.

Proudly stolen from Mock the Week.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Mary Anne's a bitch




Regina Spektor
Sailor Song

She will kiss til your lip bleeds
But she will not take her dress off
Americano, tropicano
All the sailor boys have demons
They sing "oh kentucky why did you forsake me
If i was meant to sail the sea
Why did you make me
Shouldve been with the state
Oh state..
Cause mary anne's a bitch
Mary anne's a bitch [x5]

Does it matter that our anchors
Couldnt even reach the bottom
Of a bath tub
And the sails reflect the moon
Its such a strange job
Playing black jack on the deck
Still i taught this giant bottle dressed in white
We quitely huddle with our missiles
And we miss the girls back home
Oh home sweet home
Cause mary anne's a bitch
Mary anne's a bitch [x5]

She will kiss until your lip bleeds
But she will not take her dress off
Americano, tropicano
Americano, tropicano
Americano, americano

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Cows are Evil

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Primeval

He is my reason to watch it.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

A love story

- I will love you until the day I die.
- I know you will. Just to be sure, you will die by my own hand.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Shortbus (update)



In the End

we all bear the scars
yeah, we all feign a laugh
we all cry in the dark
get cut off before we start

and as your first act begins
you realise they're all waiting
for a fall, for a flaw, for the end

and there's a past stained with tears
could you talk to quiet my fears
could you pull me aside
just to acknowledge that i've tried

as your last breath begins
contently take it in
cause we all get it in
the end

and as your last breath begins
you find your demon's your best friend
and we all get it in
the end
How cool is a movie with a character called Bitch? Very. If you believe happiness (and sorrow for the case) can only be found in a straight monogamous offspring-focused relationship don't watch this film. You won't get it. By the way, the soundtrack is amazing.

Oh joy!

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Marian and Jona

Marian and Jona were about to have lunch when the two Christians arrived in the coffee shop. An oriental guy, probably Korean, and a random girl, both with pads, pens and paper. They stopped at the table behind Marian and Joe; it wasn't very far, so they heard the whole conversation hold behind their backs.

-Hi I am *some name* of the Christian Union and I'd like you to answer a questionnaire.
-I think I've had answered that questionnaire quite a few times...
-OK thanks! *grin*

Jona nodded and glanced as far away from the aisle as he could. Marian rummaged uncomfortably in her sit. The girl smiled and repeated her formula; Marian turned around, flinched and pouted.

-We are about to have lunch...
-OK no problem! *maniac grin*

The Christians left and Joe came back from his pretended inner thoughts. Marian smiled.

-If she wants to go around convincing people she should shave. If God is love he doesn’t love her then. Her moustache hair waved towards me as she talked. Grows!
-Jeez, not a good marketing strategy indeed! Maybe it's just lack of sex and the results of accumulated hormones.

A few minutes later, Marian and Jona –chewing mouthfuls of fish & chisp- were greeted by the other Christian, the Korean guy. They replied to his advances with food sprouting out of their mouths. Not very convinced of what he had been told, the Christian guy left.

C'est la musique

Sephardi


Saturday, February 03, 2007

Angel dialogue in My own Private Idaho


Scott Favor: I only have sex with a guy for money.

Mike Waters: Yeah, I know.
Scott Favor: And two guys can't love each other.
Mike Waters: Yeah.
Mike Waters: Well, I don't know. I mean... I mean, for me, I could love someone even if I, you know, wasn't paid for it... I love you, and... you don't pay me.
Scott Favor: Mike...
Mike Waters: I really wanna kiss you, man... Well goodnight, man... I love you though... You know that... I do love you.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Me and You and Everyone We Know

))<>((

The best bit of course hahaha!

Borders

Whitest boy alive
Borders

I need it every day
I blame it on you
You always have control
Now I don't

I need it every day
I blame it on you
You always have control
Now I don't

I need it every day
I blame it on you
You always have control
Now I don't

I need it every day
I blame it on you
You always have control
Now I don't

Se murió Lola

¿Cuál Lola?

De Lola lo lamento
de mento mento santo
de santo San Tomás
de mas más mono
de mono monopolio
de poli policía
de cia ciamonte
de monte Monterrey

de rey el Rey de Roma
quítale la corona
y dásela a ______ que vino a ganar
¡Sí señor!

No me pregunten cómo me acordé de esa porra.